wondering...

Wondering...

First, whether I really am okay with all my parents saying "no" to me and my bro's relationship...

Second... why am I so lazy and totally can't be bothered to study for my last exam on Monday...

Third... why Sydney's weather is so unpredictable...

Fourth... why 20th November feels still far away from now...

Fifth... when will I get married and who'll be my life-partner...

Sixth... why am I keep thinking about my bro these days, and missing him...

Seventh... how would DBSK's come back next year look like if they ever have any...

and so on and on and on and on...

Ms. J ~

Today's pink...

When did I wrote that post about ACCT3583? I think it was last Saturday, and the exam was yesterday (Monday, 2 Nov 2009). Unexpectedly, something amazing happened on the Sunday...

Anw, to begin the story, gw bingung d... why my parents can be so contradicting???? At one side, they pushed me buat cepet2 cari cowok, but when someone I liked finally asked me out, gw ga bole jalan ama itu orang! ARRGGGHHH!!!!

Yup2, Minggu kemaren (1st November 2009 --> will treasure the date forever!), koko nembak sayaaa... Kaget abis pas baca balesan message dia di facebook... but it was real, and the way he confessed really made me happy XD Simple lines, yet so powerful... Pokoknya my fave line was when he said "Ok Re, please be my girl", then he went on with the explanation of why he asked me out, before ending it with "I love you"... Simple, gak muluk2, tp straight to the point... And this event happened exactly one day before the dreadful ACCT3583 exam XD

Pas baca, of course I was totally happy and jumping in joy... Jd ya tanpa pikir panjang lgs bales and terima... Regina dah sempet ngingetin sih, bilang dulu geh ma Mama... But gara2 hari itu msi harus blajar, I decided to tell Mom later... So that day was official kita jd couple gitu...

Then on the Monday night, I called my mom, buat minta ijin jalan ama koko... eh ternyata GA BOLEH!!!! Macem2 lah alesannya... Katanya gw belon beres kul lah (msi mo ambil Master gitu), trus it's going to be a long distant relationship.... even ntar pas gw di Surabaya, he'll be at Jakarta (my mom went on saying, "katanya ntar klo dah merit maunya msi deket ama Mama? klo dia di Jakarta gimana mo deket?") PLIZ LAAH!!! It's not like I'm going out with my bro buat langsung NIKAH!!!! PARANOID ABIS!!!! Then the next reason was, soalnya kan emang gw ga banyak ada temen cowok, and the closest one to me tuh dia... So my Mom also said, pandangan gw ttg cowok msi sempit... so jgn terikat dulu ma koko, and look for potentially other better guys... She further stated katanya background family koko gw kurang bagus lah, pergaulan dia jg aneh lah, perhatian dia ke gw kurang lah, etc etc... GILA!!! ALL OF THOSE LIST OF REASONS DAH KAYAK KOKO TUH NGELAMAR GW instead of ngajak pacaran! But then again, bener jg seh... Kan klo gw pacaran di umur skr jg pasti yg rada serius... Yg mikirnya dah ke depan... but still... kesel aja ngeliat semua alesan yang nurut gw terlalu kolot and kebanyakan mikir ke depan...

BUt anw, being all the good girl I am... I decided to call off the relationship soalnya gw ga bisa pacaran without parents permission (relationship yg ga direstui ma bonyok ga bisa lancar kan katanya?). Yes, one day right after I accepted him, I had to tell him that we can't continue the relationship. That time, I was totally blaming myself, nape waktu itu I didn't ask my mom first before answering back his feeling. Maklum, I was so excited waktu dia nembak... But then again, even if that time I asked my mom, the end result would be the same... At the end pasti ga bole jg jalan ama dia... It's just matter of time...

Well... all is not so good... I still believe that this is somehow the best way for both of us (persetan with what my parents thought, although I still want to keep thinking that they want the best for me too)... Although I do like my koko, but I do get concern about the whole long-distant relationship... And for some weird reason, pas I called him to say that we couldn't go on, somehow there was this burden got lifted off my shoulder... Rasanya lega abis... Aneh kan? Padahal I do like him... but probably, as much as I like him, I wasn't really ready for a relationship yet... Apalg a long-distance one... Klo as friends or best friends, probably it'd be acceptable and easier, but as couple, I just learnt it's really hard, although I'm not saying it's impossible...

Anw, I guess baru skr I feel all the annoyance towards my parents which I poured out in the paragraph above... Tp yg udah lewat ya udah lah ya? Somehow I just want to stick to my faith that God always allows the best to happen to me... Knowing the very fact that my koko actually has the same feeling with me is more than enough to make me feel grateful. I just want to think, if we are meant to be, then one day, there'll be a way... If we were not, then surely an even better way will be provided for both of us...

Another bright side is, my accounting exam was awesome!!! I managed to remember most of the points that I've learned... Yg sempet lupa, puji Tuhan bngt bisa inget pas exam XD Even when there was question on David Jones (padahal the lecturer mentioned there won't be question on either David Jones or Qantas), I still managed to answer it... Trus, my dad won his tender at #1 place!!! Sep2... Mantep abis... Another prayer of mine dikabulin! Trus finally, masalah Centrelink gw jg dah beres! I guess, I need to focus more on what I have at the moment, all the blessings He already gave me abundantly and be grateful, rather than focusing on what was missing and complained about it...

Honestly, I do pray to God about me n my koko... The way He answered is rather unique, I suppose? He got him to return my feeling, but He does not allow us to go on with a relationship... Hahahaha... Aneh sih, but I just want to believe this is the best for all...

Ms. J ~

ACCT3583!!! SCREW ITTT!!!! ARGGGHHH!!!!

The title is pretty much self-explanatory...

ACCT3583!!!!! TOtally a DESPICABLE subject!!!

Sooooo many damn things to remember!!!! Sooo many things to learn!!! How would I manage remember to do that!?!!

Trus terlintas...

Phil 4:13 - I can do anything through Him who strengthens me....

Amin!!!

*sigh* Can't wait until 2nd November is over.... The official day where I would not have to deal with stupid ACCT3583 anymore...

It's so weird... It's supposedly my last semester, and my last exams too... but totally didn't enjoy it... totally did not feel anything special in it... and instead, just want to get them over with QUICKLY!!!

Ms. J ~

sigh....

When was the last time I blogged? Must have been a while... Let's summarise what's been going on... Surely ga dikit...

Starting from Dong Bang yg mpe skr gak jelas gimana beritanya T.T But somehow, deep down I want to believe mereka gak bakal bubar... I still need my regular Dong Bang dose ~

About uni, next Friday I'm already doing my 1st final exam. GOOD. Emang gw pengen cepet2 final exam, coz when those exams are done, I'm officially done and got to go back to Indoooo!!! Can't wait!!! Padahal klo ditanya ya gak kangen2 mpe gimana.... Cm going back to Indo every end of semester means me escaping the stressful life I have here in Sydney...

Still about uni, I've got my overall average for my Korean History gened... It's a D! Woohooo!! The last essay was a blast! Untung I chose to have that one marked instead of doubling the mark from the first one... Soalnya it turns out I did much better in the 2nd essay, padahal totally no confidence and bayangan at all the mark will be that good XD

About short-term future plan... Master or CPA? CPA or Master? Each has their own plus and minus... But thanks to Alvin, he mentioned I should consider about ke depannya gw bakal stay di Syd ato go back to Indo? Klo ke INdo seh, probably Master is a better option... Tp klo ke depannya mau jd, let's say... Australian citizen... then CPA, or CFA is a good choice. DIpikir2 lg, gw kan emang maunya balik Indo... work in my mom's office and stuff... then maybe Master is a better choice? The tricky part about this deal tuh bukan masalah both doors are closed... justru both doors are open widely jd bingung mo masuk ke yg mana... T.T

I guess those are the highlights of my life in the past weeks where I haven't blogged...

Oh, another thing. KOKO. Ni orang maunya gimana gw bingung ~ diblg ga seneng, I think ngga d. Tp klo seneng, he doesn't seem to plan to make any movement to further the relationship. Sempet ngmgin what we think about each other, yaelah sama gitu... ckckck ~

Dahah segini dulu... so lazy to start studying for 3B...

Ms. J ~

Random...

Mau married aja susah abis seh? Ternyata emang wedding is such a BIG thing that we should not be overlooked...

Besok bolos FINS2622 lecture ah ~

Jaejoong and Yoochun's new song for the Hello Kitty's anniversary is SOOO NICCEEEEE!!!

Now with the whole CPA thing... The hell with non-award enrolment paying FULL-FEE?!!!! ARRGGGHHHH!!! I'd rather defer my graduation for another 5 months and pay like only one-fifth of the non-award enrolment for another semester!!!! But Mom said it's better to take the non-award enrolment still due to PR reason.... ARRGGHHH!!! SO EXPENSIVEEE!!!! BOMB UNSW!!!!! (or at least wait til I graduated... I want that piece of paper called graduate certificate worth thousands of dollars of my parents' money!!!)

*sigh*

Ms. J ~

BOSAN!!!!

As the title says ~~

Liburan malah ended up spent buat ngerjain assignment...

SEBAAAAAAAAAAAAALLL!!!! KEMBALIKAN LIBURANKUUUUUUU >.<

Friday, 5th September 2009

For some unknown reason, today I was feeling nostalgic... So I decided to go through my older posts and read all of the girls' crazy comments...

Truthfully, I was searching for certain post seh... And amazingly, the post I was looking for, was the post which dated exactly a year from today... Jd postnya tuh dated (and titled) Friday, 5th September 2008... Itu jaman2 we were doing Auditing together and International Banking for me and Evi... Hahahaha... Honestly, I really missed those time, girls... The times when I had my close friends there with me at uni. It really made the difference.. When you have your close friends, you felt you didn't carry your burden alone, and that no matter how hard a subject, an assignment or an exam looked like, to me, as long as I knew I wasn't doing it alone, then they didn't matter at all... Skr gw jg ada temen2 baru seh di uni, but it really is not the same with having my old mates :p

Oh, why I was searching for this one-year ago post? Coz I posted something "fun" there... And when I read through it again, how I wish it was true XD...

Ms. J ~